life as we know it

Whoaw am I ever thankful!

2009-11-26T10:27:00.003-06:00

At the beginning of January someone asked hub and I what were our "goals" for 2009. Hub quickly responded "we want to have a child in our home by the end of the year." At the time this seemed like a lofty goal given our fertility status. At that time we had just begun the foster process but we had no idea what that was going to realistically look like.

Fast forward just 11 months and we not only have one child in our home, but 3! Even more remarkable is that the girls were only suppose to stay with us a very short time and yet we still have them, almost 7 months now. The Psalms says that "children are a blessing from the Lord." We are so blessed to have experienced that blessing this year, not only with 1 child but 3. The countless hours we have poured ourselves into these children we have by far received so much more from them then we've given them.

This year has been by far the most crazy year of my life. It has been a roller coaster to say the least but it has been a thrill to ride. I am so thankful the Lord not only let me ride it, but he was sitting next the entire time. This year isn't even over and so much could still change before we enter the new year, but for now, we are enjoying every moment we can.

For a quick update on all our kids, their status' change all the time. Right now we are literally month-to-month with the girls. They could leave at anytime or they could be with us for quite some time. We'll have the baby for a while still. His adoption status is still unknown and we won't know for a while. We count every day we get with them such a joy and we trust the Lord will comfort us if/when they depart from our home.

My thankful list this year is virtually endless. I am astonished and blown away at what the Lord has let me experience this year.

I blame it on the fancy phone

2009-11-26T10:18:00.003-06:00

I could come up with a multitude of excuses for why I haven't blogged in almost 2 months, but the real culprit is my phone. You see, I'd been using the same old phone I had 9 years ago! It was dated to say the least. Every 2 years I would get my free upgrade but in a matter of months, the new phone would die for one reason or another and I would resort back to the trusty proven dinosaur.

In October we were scheduled for yet another upgrade and this time I got the fancy phone that puts the world wide web at the touch of my hands at all times. I have opened my lap top 5 times in the last 2 months because everything I need is on my phone. The lap top is great but when you have 2 little sets of hands that love the lap top it makes it challenging to open it very often. So alas, my facebook status updates have become more frequent but my poor neglected blog is, well, neglected.

I am stealing a great idea from a friend and I'm going to start posting my facebook status updates on the blog once a month. I put a lot of Miss M's quotes on there so this way all of you non-facebookers, can laugh along with the rest of us.

Remembering

2009-10-01T10:04:00.004-05:00

I can't believe it's Oct 1 already. This date marks the due date of another life we had the privilege of celebrating 8 months ago. I have such mixed emotions about this loss in our life. All of the "what if's" start coming to mind. "If" we had been able to maintain this pregnancy we would not have the 3 children we have right now. I'm looking at my living room and I see 3 precious living lives the Lord has entrusted us with. Like our pregnancies, we don't know how long we will be able to love and care for these love bugs but we celebrate everyday we have with them. I know that God does not hold any good thing from His children and I trust in that.

I'm overwhelmed with gratitude for the blessing children are. I am able to parent and experience those blessings even though my body rejects life. How awesome is that! God is good, all the time.

A Poop Story

2009-09-22T14:19:00.004-05:00

I think every parent has a poop story. I can remember my mom sharing a poop story with us on more then one occasion. I guess I've been a parent long enough to finally have my own poop story, so here goes.

A couple days ago the girls were just not going down for a nap. It was a flat out battle and I did not win. Miss M was pretty mad at me for making her stay in her bed but eventually she calmed down enough to at least get some quiet time in. I could hear the girls talking to each other but I thought I'd at least take some quiet time over no time at all.

When I decided it was time for them to come out, I opened the door and was met by a horrific smell of feces! I looked right at Miss M and said, "where did you poop?!?" She started pointing to a few spots. I quickly assessed the situation and realized it was bad....bad bad. She had apparently pooped on her blanket but got it all over herself while she was at it. She took off her blanket and her MATTRESS COVER and proceeded to use the mattress as her toilet paper! There was poop smeared ALL OVER her mattress!

I not-so-calmly took her to the bathroom to clean her up. I then cleaned up the blanket. But what to do about the mattress? I called a few people for advise and finally turned to the world wide web for answers. A google search led me to another woman's blog who had a similar story only on the carpet. She suggested hydrogen peroxide as it is known to get out blood stains. I dowsed the mattress in it and let it sit for a while. Then I used our handy dandy small carpet cleaner and put enzyme killing pet cleaner in it. Between the 2 of them, it seemed to do the trick. The mattress doesn't have any odor nor stain. I hope you never encounter this type of poop story but if you do, I highly suggest hydrogen peroxide and an enzyme killer.

Do you have a poop story? Do share and we can commiserate!

Life in the fast lane.

2009-09-07T21:42:00.003-05:00

Whew! Has it really been 2.5 weeks since I last posted? Sorry guys. It's getting late and I really need to get some sleep before the baby wakes up for the first shift so I'll give you the low down in bullet points.

-We LOVE being parents of a newborn! I think everything he does is so adorable...even the yucky things. So far things are going pretty well with him. He has had a few rough nights due to a little congestion but last night he seemed to do much better.
-Miss Z is finally sleeping through the night!!! The first 2 nights we had the baby she woke up several times. I thought I was going to go crazy with 2 kids waking up at different times. We experimented with a few things and were finally able to get her to sleep without waking up. Seriously PTL!
-The girls are doing really well adjusting to the new addition. MUCH better then I expected. Miss Z had a few hard moments the first couple days but she has been doing great the last week.
-We no longer have the 2-on-2 advantage. We, as parents, are out numbered. This poses some unique challenges but we're figuring it out as we go.
-Now for the sad news. We found out we were pregnant 2 weeks ago. Four days after celebrating all that the 2 pink lines meant, we found out we were no longer pregnant. I honestly thought that miscarriages would be easier after we had kids in our home, especially a baby. I can now say it is not. Just different. With our other loses, I grieved a dream. I didn't have anything tangible to grieve. After holding a newborn in my arms and watching Miss M and Miss Z grow and change, I know what I've lost. A child. I don't know if that makes sense at all. This pregnancy was a weird one on several accounts but primarily because it was so short. My doc is running a few more tests to see if anything has changed since February. I'm doing pretty well with it all right now. I had a few meltdowns when the bleeding began but the Lord has sustained me through yet another loss.
-We got many comments about how hard newborns are. We braced ourselves for the worst. So far he is way easier then the toddlers. He can't talk back, he can't get into everything, and he doesn't have years of baggage. Maybe it will get harder but for now, we can't complain. Going from no kids to 2 toddlers was a shock to the system, to say the least. Adding 1 more into the mix who sleeps a TON has been an adjustment but nothing like we experienced just 3 short months ago.
-It's really fun being a family of 5. I will be really really sad when we have to go down to a family of 3. Someone is always doing something silly or cute. There is never a dull moment and time seems to slip away into never never land.

That's it for now. I need to start writing down all the funny things Miss M has been saying lately. She has been cracking us up non-stop with the way she phrases things. I'll try and do a post of her latest comments soon.

The stork delivered!

2009-08-21T18:26:00.001-05:00

We got our tiny Baby T!!!! He is so precious! I'll give more of an update later. Right now I'm going to enjoy holding him but wanted to give you a quick update.

We are adding another car seat!

2009-08-20T08:21:00.002-05:00

Last weekend we bought a minivan. There is something wonderfully ironic about this picture. I'm 25, infertile, and yet I can't fit all our car seats in our semi-luxury sedan. So we lowered our debt, and got an amazing deal on a used Honda Odyssey.

I'm sure glad we decided to get it! This Friday we are getting an baby boy! Now I can't tell you how old he is or his name but let's just say he is really really really young and we'll call him Baby T for this blogs sake.

We've been almost this close to getting an infant before an then it fell through at the last minute. So while I am very confident we will get him on Friday, nothing is certain until we have him in our spiffy van. I'll let you know if it all works out Friday night.

We'll have gone from 0 kids to 3 in exactly 3 months if this works out. Crazy to say the least. We will love on these kids for as long as the Lord will allow us to. Miss Z and Miss M are still a temporary placement and we have no idea how long we'll have them. The verdict is still out on this baby's future but it looks like we'll have him for quite a while at the minimum.

Oh, quick update on Chase. He is doing MUCH better! We avoided surgery thanks to a speedy ENT doctor at the ER.

Strep can turn into what???

2009-08-17T22:08:00.003-05:00

We've had quite an eventful few days. Thursday night Chase was not feeling well at all and called into work sick. By the next day he looked at me and said he was going to go to an urgent care doctor to get his throat looked at. Side Note: My husband doesn't go to doctors! Seriously, he has only been to a doc 1 other time in our 3 1/2 years of marriage...and that was a couple months ago with his staph infection. So when he told me he needed to see a doctor I knew he really wasn't feeling well.

They put him on an antibiotic and said it was strep. Great. Strep goes away pretty quickly with an antibiotic...or so we thought. Saturday morning, well really the middle of the night, he woke up in horrible pain. I look a look at his throat and said he should probably go to the ER. It was bad! I had never seen anything like it before! This was no longer Strep.

He went to a local ER who tested him for Strep and Mono, both came back negative. They didn't let him see the ER doctor and gave him another antibiotic and sent him home. Ugh! No answers.

So let's fast forward to this morning. He had been running a high fever for 4 days straight now. He woke up and said it was now effecting his breathing. I take a look at it and what do I see? I giant white puss pocket that is taking over half of his throat!!! I wish I was exaggerating. This time I take him to a different ER which was a good move. After the ER doc looked at it, he immediately called an ENT doc. Dr. S, the ENT doc, said it was on the verge of becoming an abscess. The only way to get rid of an abscess is surgery. He immediately placed hubby on a really strong antibiotic through the IV. He said if it doesn't get better or gets worse by tomorrow morning, he'll have to come in and do surgery.

His fever has broke, praise the Lord!, and he is feeling a lot better. The bulging puss pocket seems to be getting small, but definitely still there. We are praying we can avoid surgery! On our way out of the hospital this morning, they said this is really serious. If it gets to the point that it did this morning, don't bother driving him to the ER, just call an ambulance. This makes me even more frustrated with the first ER he went to as they would not let him see the ER doctor. If only we were into sewing....but we aren't. I'm just glad we went back in for a second opinion.

The moral of the story is: if you have a sore throat and think it may be strep, seek medical attention immediatly. If it goes untreated too long, it can develope into a deep infection that is called a really long word that I can't pronouce...this can then turn into an abscess which is really painful (so I hear) and will result in immidiate surgery. Oh, did I mention that you can also have perminent kidney damage? Minor side effect.

The Coaster Continues

2009-08-10T13:03:00.002-05:00

I'm not going to go into a ton of detail here but I wanted to briefly catch you up on our week last week. We were offered an infant, accepted, but at the last minute we weren't able to take the baby. We continue to wait for the baby the Lord has for us. For one reason or another, most of our plans last week did not go as planned so we had to be majorly flexible.

We celebrated my youngest sisters birthday on Friday night. It's hard to believe my baby sister is already 21! I made homemade lasagna and ravioli in a cream sauce for our family get together. I have a pasta attachment to my Kitchen Aid and the past turned out great! That was the first 'high maintenance' meal I've made since we've had the girls.

Mom and sister and I saw Julie & Julia yesterday. I highly recommend it! It was hilarious and had a great story line. The only thing I would not recommend were the previews before the movie! Seriously! 4 out of 6 of them were trailers for horror films coming out soon. Really? Do you know what audience is attending Julie & Julia? Not people who will see horror films anytime soon. It was really strange.

My Bad

2009-07-24T23:26:00.002-05:00

Tonight at dinner I totally forgot to pray. In the middle of dinner, Miss M said, "We forgot to pray! Jesus, Thank you for this food. I love you Jesus. Amen!" Thank you Miss M for remembering to pray!

Lord, thank you for allowing me to see how much Miss M is learning about You. Continue to teach her about how much You love her and desire an intimate relationship with her.

THIS makes the ENTIRE journey worth it!

Visiting the PoPo

2009-07-23T18:48:00.003-05:00

For those of you who don't know, 'PoPo' refers to police officers or cops. My youngest sister affectionately refers to them by this name.

When we first got Miss M, every time we saw a Cop or police car, she would FREAK out. She frequently said, "Cops are bad. They will hurt me." We've been working with her quite a bit on this. We tell her that cops are nice and they are here to help us when we need them. Now when we see one she will look at us and ask, "Are cops bad? They won't hurt me?"

This morning on our walk I decided to give the local police dept a call. The Lt. on duty said we could come down and they would show us around. He was so sweet. He wasn't in his uniform when I called him this morning and all the officers were out so he changed just for us. They showed us the dispatch room with all the nifty computers. He then took us out and let the girls play in the cars. He let them turn on the lights and even the siren! Miss M LOVED this part of our visit. He let them sit on the motorcycle to which Miss M was simply giddy about. It was too precious.

As we were leaving Miss M said, "Cops are nice! They are here to help!" You got it sweetie!

This journey is quite the ride!

2009-07-23T18:40:00.003-05:00

For those of you that have followed this blog for a while, you've probably picked up on the theme of our life...change and uncertainty. While at times this can be difficult it forces hubby and I to be completely dependent on the Lord for the next turn in the road. This is pretty ironic since we are both planners at heart.

All that to say, I got a call from our caseworker today saying that the visit this weekend has been postponed until 2 weeks from now! I'm SOOOO relieved! I was really anxious about what this visit would do to them. Hubby will be back by then and will be able to help out with the aftermath of the visit.

Another HUGE exciting update is that Miss M went THE ENTIRE day without a meltdown! This is seriously amazing! She woke up bright eyed and bushy tailed at 6:25 this morning. By 10Am I realized we hadn't had a meltdown yet so I told her "Wow Miss M! We haven't had to do a think-about-it-time this morning! Great job listening to mommy!" To which she replied, "Oh I know." Smarty pants!

Single Parenting

2009-07-22T20:58:00.004-05:00

Hubby is out of town for 2 weeks so I'm trying my hand at this single parenting thing....and I don't like it very much. Today is only day 2 and while it hasn't been quite as hard as I thought, it sure isn't fun or easy!

Two weeks ago the girls had a weekend visit with their bio family and it took a full week to get them back to 'normal'. I just found out today that they are getting another one this weekend. They weren't suppose to get another one for a long time but a few things did not go as planned so here we go again. I'm really not looking forward to the aftermath that these poor things endure with another transition like this. It is so hard on them since they can't communicate their feelings...well I take that back...they communicate through meltdowns and defiance.

Last time we had one of these hub and I were able to distract ourselves while they were away. This time, I don't have hub to distract me from missing them. While it is sort of nice to have the quiet house and time for me to nap, my protective mothering comes out and I don't want them leave to an emotionally unsafe place. It would be one thing to have them visit my mom or a friend for the weekend....its another thing to place them in arms that you dont' necessarily trust.

It's a good thing they are in the Lords hands even when I'm not there to protect them. Lord, protect their hearts during this transition and uncertainty.

We do have good news for the week! Miss M is almost fully potty trained!!! She has done such a good job at telling me when she has to go. We've had very few accidents this week. I hope she can keep up the good work when she is with her family this weekend.

A Rough Week

2009-07-12T20:52:00.003-05:00

We were at the doctors 4 times this week! I went initially because Miss M had a bad rash. While I was there I asked that the doc to check out her throat because her voice was a little horse. She hadn't mentioned a sore throat and acted completely healthy, so too my surprise, the doc said she had strep!

The next day Chase went in because his nose was really red and swollen. Turns out he had a staph infection! Miss Z and I ended up getting staph the next day. Chase had to go back on Friday so the doctor could work on his nose again.

Needless to say, Chase and I spent all day Saturday sanitizing our apartment. We are all on strong antibiotics and no longer contagious which is great.

On a good note, Miss M used the potty 3 times today! We are majorly focusing on potty training this week. I've never potty trained a toddler so if you have any tips, pass them along!

Another Year

2009-07-12T20:44:00.003-05:00

Friday, July 10th was the first year anniversary of our first babies due date. Last year when this date came around, it was rough. I was very emotional. This year I was more reflective on what the Lord has brought out of this loss. I was sad wondering what life would be like with a one year old running around but grateful that the Lord has led us to where we are right now.

Convo's with Miss M

2009-07-04T14:57:00.002-05:00

Miss M got a doll from one of our friends that she has been obsessed with for the last 24 hours. I must say, she is doing a pretty good job as a mother. She rocks her, makes sure she has enough sleep, feeds her... I decided to ask her a few questions about her new baby doll and here's what I got.

What's your babies name? Baby

Is Baby a boy or girl? Girl

How old is Baby? 2 months

What does baby eat? Baby apple sauce

Do you love your baby? Yes!

After the questionnaire, she came up to me and said, "I want you to hold Baby in your tummy?"

Me: Tummy? How does that work?

Miss M: I mean on your lap.

Miss M: Baby wants Oatmeal. Tie It! (as she hands me a bib for her baby)

She is really starting to parrot us, most of the time that is a good thing :) The other day I was looking for a piece to my immersion blender. She asked what I was doing and I told her "Mommy can't find a part that I need to finish making dinner."

Miss M quietly watched me search through all the cupboards. When I found it she announced, "Good job Mommy! Good job finding it!"

What a Sceen!

2009-07-02T17:04:00.003-05:00

So picture this: Miss M opened up our wedding album and found a page with both Chase and I on it. She layed prostrate hugging the album and said the following for about 10 minutes:

I love Chase. I love Chase. I Love Chase. I lUv Chase! I love Chase. I love Chase. I lUv Chase! I love Chase. I love Mommy! I love Chase......

I didn't know there were so many different ways to say I love Chase! And at least I got one I love mommy in there! Too precious. I only wish I had the video camera out. But alas, it was packed away and it would have taken me 10 minutes to get it out and start recording.

Oh, and today I was watching Paula Deen who always makes yummy desserts that Miss M comments on. She asked me what her name was and then said 'I love Paula!'

Blueberries and More

2009-06-26T14:48:00.003-05:00

Has it really been 1o days since my last post? I guess the date on the last post doesn't lie. Sorry it's been so long. Here's what's been going on.

This past Monday we went blueberry picking! If you live near East Texas and you haven't been blueberry picking, it's a must! Well that is of course if you actually like blueberries. We went to Echo Springs Blueberry Farm and had a blast!....well let me re-phrase that, once we actually arrived we had a blast. The ride to and from were pretty miserable. I thought the girls would sleep but no such luck. Miss M tried to get out of her car seat constantly because she wanted me to hold her. I was stopping the car every 15-20 minutes to buckle her back in. Ugh.

Miss M picked a lot of blueberries but only 5 made it into the bucket. The rest ended up in her mouth. Which is a great healthy snack...but blueberries are full of fiber.... Need I go further with that thought? For the next 2 days her bottom was stained a greenish/blueish color...I almost took a picture but thought that might be a little too gross.

We've officially had the girls one month. The time has flown by so fast and we continue to adjust. Miss Z is sleeping through the night just great but Miss M still wakes up with night terrors. I've spent the last couple nights sleeping on her floor. It's so sad, she wakes up every 30-60 minutes and yells "Mommy." If I'm in the room I quickly assure her I'm there and she goes back to sleep. If I'm not there she starts screaming until I come.

The only thing I miss since taking the girls is date nights! Seriously. In order for anyone to watch our girls for us, they have to have current CPR and be background checked by MCH. So far my mom is the only who meets those qualifications. She has been so sweet to watch the girls when we have an event but we have yet to have a date.

Oatmeal+Toddlers

2009-06-16T07:55:00.002-05:00

Oh how I wish I could post some pics of the girls on here. They are on their 3rd bowl, each!, of oatmeal. They can't get enough of this stuff. They'd rather have oatmeal than Cheerios...I don't think I have normal toddlers in my home. Miss Z has gotten 2 bowls in her mouth and the other bowl she is wearing...and it is so stinkin cute!

We've already had a big morning in our home. Miss M finally used the toilet for the first time, it was very exciting. She got to wear her big girl undies until she wet them...now it's back to the diaper until she tinkles in the toilet again.

....ok so I just gave Miss Z her 4th bowl of oatmeal!....This little thing can EAT!

We are still getting adjusted to this thing called parenting. It's been hard to jump into it like we have but the Lord has given us the strength and patience we need. We keep learning as much as we can about child development and how trauma, neglect, and abuse, play a role in their development. This has helped us with compassion when we have a 3 hour meltdown!!! Or when she damages our home on purpose....They are nasty meltdowns. These meltdowns make me so sad because I know she is just acting out of fear from rough past. If you and I had gone through everything these little girls have gone through we'd have nasty meltdowns too!

We have had the girls 3 weeks now and I've already made 3 trips to the doctor. Miss Z's ear infection hasn't gone away even though we have finished her antibiotics so it's onto even stronger antibiotics...ugh. Miss M has a horrible diaper rash that started spreading to her legs. Turns out its a bacterial infection, which means more antibiotics. Can you tell I'm not a fan of antibiotics?

Miss M is now calling me mommy and she calls hubby by his first name. She started off calling me Liz, then it turned to momma Liz, and now its mommy.

We are able to get through several books with Miss M. We read 'You are Special' by Max Lucado a lot so she frequently asks us "I am special?" to which we reply, "Oh Miss M, you are so special. You are special to us but you are even more special to God."

Oh another improvement is that Miss M stayed in children's church the entire time this past week! We were so grateful for that!

Okay so those are some of the updates. It's a little harder to blog with everything that is going on right now but I'll do my best to do at least a once a week post with updates. So much more happens in a week with them around!

We have a winner!

2009-06-13T14:29:00.002-05:00

Thanks for posting your highlights of the year! They were really fun and encouraging to read. I took all your comments and put them in bowl, closed my eyes, and grabbed one. Our winner of either the Starbucks or Sonic gift card is..... my sister, Grace!

Can family be apart of the prize winnings?? lol My highlight was definitely WILDWOOD! I learned so much in that little town and met some of the greatest people there. Spiritually I grew a lot and became even more confident in Christ! Woohoo!

Grace works at Starbucks so we'll see what she chooses!

Post #100=Prize Time!

2009-06-10T08:37:00.003-05:00

I've been blogging for almost a year, just 3 weeks shy, and this is my 100th post!!! It all started on June 26th, 2008 with this post.

Our life has changed quite a bit since this first post. Our little family has grown 150% by adding a dog in November and then these 2 girls...and a good possibility of another one by the end of the month.

We've ridden a few intense roller coasters over the last 12 months. We rode the 'deployment roller coaster' for about 5 months when we weren't sure if Chase was getting deployed or not. At times it was a daily up and down as he was told he was going one day and told no the next.

We rode the 'fertility roller coaster' with yet another pregnancy and miscarriage.

And finally we most recently rode the 'placement roller coaster' as we were told we would get 2 different sets of sibling groups before the girls we have now.

If you've followed my blog for very long you've been apart of these crazy roller coasters. The good news is that even though there are a lot of scary lows to roller coasters, there is also the thrill of the up climb and the anticipation it brings. We've had a lot of great moments over the last year. We've been able to trust the Lord with our future, BIG TIME, we were able to celebrate life with you through the pregnancy, and now we've had the joy of taking care of 2 precious girls.

What has been your favorite moment in your life over the last 12 months? Post a comment with this answer and I'll do a drawing for a Starbucks or Sonic gift card, your choice!!! It's going to be a hard decision because who doesn't like Starbucks but Sonic does have a great happy hour from 2-4 on their drinks. Post a comment before 7:00PM (Central Standard Time) on Friday, June 12. I'll randomly choose a winner and announce who the blessed individual is on Saturday.

Baby Shower

2009-06-06T20:17:00.004-05:00

Tonight we went to a friends fun baby shower. We try and prep Miss M for everything we do so she isn't caught off guard. Here's how the convo went:

Me: "Miss M, tonight we are going to go to something called a baby shower! One of my friends has a baby in her tummy so we get to celebrate!"

Long pause

Miss M: "A baby shower?"

Long pause

Miss M: "Like a pardy?"

Me: "Yes, like a party! We are going to meet knew people and eat some food and celebrate the baby that will be born soon."

Really Long pause

Miss M: "Like a birdday party?" ...Yes I spelled birthday bird-day because that how she pronouces 'th'.

Me: "Yes! Just like a birthday party! We are celebrating the birth that is to come. And maybe they will even have cake there just like a birthday party."

It takes her a bit to process but she's getting the hang of it!

Life in Toddler Land

2009-06-05T15:11:00.003-05:00

The girls are down for a nap, and once again the house is quiet. I never thought I'd enjoy the quietness so much. It's really a beautiful thing. The apartment is a disaster but I think I'll just bask in the calmness right now rather than clean.

I took the girls to Boomerangs this morning for the Watermark Building Blocks Fun Friday. I had no idea that such places existed but it was really fun! It's an indoor bounce house extravaganza! I wish I could post pics of the girls but alas, I can't. Miss M thoroughly enjoyed herself, especially the bounce houses with slides. Miss Z on the other hand was a bit pretentious. I think she was a bit overwhelmed. It seems to take her a while to warm up to new things.

This morning the girls didn't get up until 7:3o! I was able to take a shower, blow dry my hair, put on a little makeup, and do a quiet time all before they got up....it was amazing!

I think the girls are both starting to come out of the honeymoon phase. Many adoptive and foster kids have honeymoon phases where they act a lot better then normal. The meltdowns are getting more frequent and intense and we are beginning to see different sides to them.

I don't think I've said this yet on the blog but I love my job! It's seriously the hardest thing I've ever done...no kids to 2 toddlers overnight...but it's been such a joy and I'm so thankful the Lord has allowed us to do this.

The Joys

2009-06-03T13:33:00.003-05:00

The girls are down for a nap so I have a few minutes to write and catch everyone up on our life.

We were on an Apartment Life retreat this past weekend at this amazing log-cabin-style mansion lake house about 2 hours away. I was a little concerned about taking the girls since I didn't know how they would react to seeing 40 people all at once but they did great for the most part. We had a lot of fun swimming, playing in the sand, and taking nature walks. Towards the end Miss Z was getting really really fussy and kept scratching on her ear. I took her to the doc yesterday and sure enough, she has a nasty ear infection. She has been doing better today but still more fussy then usual (but I realize our 'usual' is only based on a week with these girls).

Miss M keeps having some nasty meltdowns. It's really tough to see her go through them. I don't want to go into to much detail about them but they make us wonder what in the world has gone on in her little life.

Miss M sat through an entire book with me last night! That was HUGE because when we got her a week ago she was only interested in one-word-per-page books. The one we read last night was by Max Lucado, called Hermie (who writes THE BEST children's books).

We are working on colors with Miss M. Until now everything has been purple in her world. Today's color is yellow. We've been seeing yellow everywhere and I think she finally has it down...for today at least. I think tomorrow we'll try green.

So far half of today has been spent in the bathroom. Miss M found her big girl panties and has been wanting to wear them. I told her as soon as she goes tinkle in the potty she can wear them and get a special treat. She keeps asking me to go to the potty but then nothing...we just sit there. I'm glad she is interested in the potty because those #5 diapers are EXPENSIVE! If any of you have some wisdom of potty training, let me know! I'm not pushing this on her at all though because of so much change she's had recently. She seems to want this on her own so that's why we are trying this out.

I learned today that both the girls LOVE hummus. I sat them down to eat their yummy toddler friendly lunch today but they were much more interested in my hummus and sprouted tortilla chips. Miss M was literally spooning the hummus. She ate 1/2 of the tub!

I've also learned that I cannot get through the day without a good quiet time. Seriously. I'm at my whits end if I try to do this on my own. Thank you Lord for forcing me to be dependent on you.

The last news is that the family ahead of us on the infant list will be getting their infant this week. Our caseworker told me yesterday that they are expecting a birth at the end of the month and another one early July. This means it will be very plausible for us to have 3 under the age of 3 by the end of the month! We are very excited but freaking out just a little bit. But just like everything else with this process, we'll believe it when we see it.

Wild and Crazy

2009-05-28T20:09:00.002-05:00

The last two days have gone pretty well. We are all (and I mean ALL...especially our dog Jackson) still adjusting. Miss M had her first big tantrum today. She had to sit in the 'think about it' chair for about 10 minutes. She determines how long she stays there. When she is ready to tell us what she did wrong and how to do it right she can get off the chair. We've been constantly learning about respect. We respect toys, dogs, couches, and especially people. This includes what we say, how we say it, and how we care for those things.

I think Miss Z may have an ear infection...not sure though. She keeps touching her ears and rubbing them. I'm not looking forward to visiting the doctor because I've heard everything with Medicaid takes longer.

So here are a couple of my thoughts on parenting:
-Momma's of 2 or more toddlers are excused from working out in a gym because your working out ALL day. We've got cardio, chasing the girls in the park and dancing, and plenty of weight building, picking them up and rocking them to sleep (we don't have a rocker so this is done manually).

-My house will never be clean again! The only time to clean is during nap time but that time is also used for cooking dinner and maybe squeaking a nap in myself.

-The girls SQUEAL with delight when hub comes home! They race to see who can get around his neck first. It is soooooo sweet! I need to get it on camera soon.

-I LOVE seeing them in the morning. I can't wait to wake them up! Miss Z has the biggest smile on her face and does a little panting thing which is so adorable.

-My apartment just shrank a ton! Something about adding 2 little girls made it shrink overnight. We like to spend a lot of time outside at the park and pool. They love to run and run in the part. It's definitely a 2 man job though so I've had a couple residents who stay home come out with us.

Oh goodness, got to run...they both just woke up SCREAMING!

Sound Asleep

2009-05-26T20:59:00.003-05:00

Whew! What a day. First let me apologize if you called or texted me today and I did not return the call or text. The phone was ringing off the hook which was such a blessing knowing people care and love us but we weren't able to answer many of the phone calls with everything going on. It's crazy to think that we woke up this morning with no kids and we're going to bed with 2 toddlers sound asleep in our apartment. Welcome to parenthood!

We spoke the their caseworker for quite a while learning more details of their history and personalities. We found out the story we told when they asked us to take them was not accurate on several accounts. The girls are a lot younger than we were told and we'll most likely have them longer than anticipated...which we don't mind at all! They are so beautiful! I wish I could post a picture of them.

Today went pretty smooth with the older sister...we'll call her Miss M (her name does not start with an 'M' but I need some sort of initial!) She is adjusting really well so far. I'm just nervous this is a 'honeymoon' stage and she'll wake up in a couple days and act like a different girl. The younger girl (we'll call her Miss Z) had some rough moments but we got through them.

Tomorrow night we have an event. Mom is coming over to watch the girls which is such a big help. I hope they do ok with yet another transition as hub and I come and go as we set up.

Thanks for all your prayers and support as we all adjust. It seriously means the world to us!

We have them!

2009-05-26T15:31:00.002-05:00

I'll post more about it tonight but wanted to let you know that everything went as planned! Thanks for your prayers.

So far so good!

2009-05-25T22:30:00.004-05:00

Well we never got a call saying tomorrow was off so so far everything is going as planned! We are suppose to get them tomorrow afternoon. I'll let you know if/when it goes through. We installed 2 toddler car seats in our car this evening. We picked out girly bedding, got a few basics like tooth brushes, a toddle potty seat, hair clips.... I hope it goes through. I don't want to have to return things again.

We were walking through Target and hubby kept asking me if we need to get this and that. I finally looked at him and said, 'I think the only phrase that's going to come out of my mouth for a while is, 'i don't know." That's how I feel right now. I. Don't. Know. I don't know how to parent an infant, much less 2 little girls in 2 completely different stages in life who have had who-knows-what kind of trauma in their precious little lives. We've read some good books but I've never practiced any of this. Yesterday's message at Watermark was perfect for me in many ways. It was on the story of the 2 fish and 5 loaves of bread. We all know the story, but this time it went a little deeper. I don't know how to love these girls and how to meet their needs but the Lord does. I need to give Him my measly 2 fish and 5 loaves and let Him multiply it into exactly what these girls need.

"Lord help me give you what I see as so little and trust You to glorify Yourself in ways that I can't fathom right now. Help my unbelief."

Toddler update

2009-05-22T16:11:00.004-05:00

We are still getting the girls but it has been postponed until Tuesday. I'll let you know if anything changes.

Several times over the last week I've been wanting to bust out and sing "Roller Coaster...."

Chase was really sweet and we had a great date night last night. We went to a resturant that I've been wanting to try for years but it's really pricy. It's called Jaspers and its at the Shops at Legacy in Plano. It was GREAT food! The owner also has a restraut called Abacus in Uptown.

3rd Times a Charm???

2009-05-20T21:52:00.005-05:00

Yep, we got offered another placement today. They are 2 toddler aged girl siblings. They are most likely not adoptable but taking them won't prevent us from getting an adoptable infant if one becomes avaiable in the next could months. They are already under Methodists care in another city so everything should work out this time. We are scheduled to get them sometime on Friday.

We would love to provide a loving and stable home for them as long as the Lord will allow us to have them. I'll let you know sometime on Friday if we get them.

Let's talk about fun things

2009-05-14T14:45:00.002-05:00

I've been pretty down the last 2 days with the drama that unfolded and then getting so sick. I'm finally feeling much better. I still can't seem to eat much, 7-up and Saltine crackers are my friend right now. I think I might actually leave the house today! I'm excited about that.

I don't really want to talk about the last couple days or my emotions right now so let's talk about some fun things. Next week I've got 2 cake tastings scheduled for upcoming wedding cakes. I'm very excited about this. This is when I'll figure out exactly what the brides want in their design and the 'vision' starts to really come together.

Another fun thing to talk about is how amazing I've been feeling!...well minus the last 2 days. I think this crazy diet thing is really working. My pain level has dramatically diminished. The month before I saw Dr. R I was having 2-3 endo pains an hour. Now, I have maybe 6 per month. BIG difference. I've also lost 16 pounds! Crazy. This stomach virus helped with the last 2 pounds...but I'll still count it! Chase has lost 17 pounds. We went to Ross the other night and Chase picked out a cute outfit for me. We guessed on the size of shorts because I didn't have time to try them on and they fit perfectly. This is 2 sizes smaller than 3 months ago!

Chase and I have been learning a TON about parenting recently. We've been reading The Connected Child by Karyn Purvis, who I've mentioned before, and it has been giving us a lot of great information. It is specific to parenting children who come from 'hard places' but many of the principles are relevant to biological children as well. I would HIGHLY recommend it for every parent.

Twins Update

2009-05-12T22:22:00.002-05:00

I wish I could say that everything went as planned and we picked up the twins this morning...but alas, it did not go as planned. Without going into a lot of details, there is a chance we could still get them but it doesn't look good. My biggest concern is for the girls' safety. Please pray for them.

I woke up in the middle of the night and quickly realized I have caught the stomach virus mom, sister, and nephew had. It was/is nasty! I didn't sleep much last night but I was able to read about 1/2 a book while I hung out in the bathroom....productive sickness :) I'm doing a little better this evening but still running a decent fever. Chase is also under the weather...we are pretty pathetic right now.

We ran to Target last night to pick up a few necessities for the twins. We didn't take anything out of their packages and kept the receipts. Apparently that was a smart decision. We are really bummed and sad. My perspective on this entire process is that I'll believe it when I'm holding kids in my arms and taking them home. It's tough though. Nothing is for certain. Oh how I long to be 'normal' and have a 'normal' pregnancy but more then that, I long to be exactly where the Lord wants us and have the family the Lord wants us to have. Sorry for the raw emotions but that's where I'm at this evening.

Kiddo's TOMORROW!

2009-05-11T16:59:00.003-05:00

Few! Just got a call from MCH asking if we could take 2...I said 2! 2 yr old twins!!!! And the crazier thing is that we said YES! They didn't know much nor the adoption status but they needed as answer asap. We'll most likely pick them up tomorrow MORNING! I know, I'm using a lot of capitals but that's pretty much how I feel at the moment.

I'll let you know more when I know more...probably tomorrow evening sometime. And again, I can't post pictures which I'm really bummed about. Thanks for you prayers...we could really use them right now.

Extra Time with Martin

2009-05-10T15:45:00.003-05:00

My sister was suppose to leave yesterday. After checking in at the airport, she quickly realized she was sick....sick sick sick. Poor thing. Due to the swine flu outbreak, she was able to change her flight for no fee which was great! She had a rough night last night and then she called me this morning and said my mom was really sick too! They were both too weak to take care of Martin so I came over and picked him us. It's been fun having him over here today. He is such an adorable and fun baby. Here are some pic's from his time with us.

I'm sad sister and mom are so sick but it's been fun having some extra time with my nephew!

Cakes, Baby M, and Update

2009-05-05T21:30:00.005-05:00

We got our fun new camera in last Friday. We've (actually it's more like Chase) been reading the manual and learning all about the many buttons. I think we've got the basics down, f-stop, shutter speed, iso ect. but there is still so much to learn.

Cakes: I've done 2 cakes over the last couple days so here are their pics.

Baby M: My sister is visiting from Phoenix for the week. She brought her precious 14 month old with her. Here are some pics from today.

Update: There really isn't much to update you on. There has still been know news from the kids' caseworker so at this point there is very little chance we'll get them. We finished up the last class yesterday so our license may be in the mail as we speak. We'll let you know if we get another placement offer but for now we just hurry up and wait.

Bummed?

2009-05-01T09:37:00.002-05:00

Yesterday we got an email from MCH saying they have not heard anything more on the kiddos. They were suppose to get a fax on Monday with all their info but the fax never came. They said "sometimes this just happens. We won't hear back from a caseworker ever again or sometimes they call back a week later." Hum..... I'm sure glad the Lord knows what is going on because we sure don't. We are bummed but still a little hopeful. It seems our married life has revolved around unknowns, why should this be any different?

We go in on Monday to finish up the class that will complete our license so maybe we'll find out more info then. This journey to parenthood is turning out to be quite the adventure!

On a very exciting note, we ordered a Nikon D90 and it should arrive today! We have been saving for a while and really wanted to get it before we have kids. We choose the D90 over a Cannon because it has HD video on it! Chase has been taking a photography class online so he's getting photography-lingo savvy.

Babies Update

2009-04-26T09:50:00.005-05:00

Yes, you read correctly, babIES. Plural. I'll start at the beginning. Friday morning we received an email from our director saying that our license was held up in Waco because the state just mandated that one of the classes we took now has to be 8 hours instead of 6. MCH is scrounging to come up with an additional 2 hour class for us asap. Hopefully it will be sometime this week or early next week. As soon as that is finished, our license will be in the mail.

I had to go in to see our director on Friday for a few additional items and while I was there she offerred us a placement. A baby and a toddler sibling group. I can't tell you the exact ages via the Internet so that will at least give you an idea. One is a boy and one is a girl but at that moment she didn't know which was which. She didn't have any more information for us except that she thinks they will be become adoptable and we are the only family at the moment who are available to take adoptable babies. Since we don't have our license yet we obviously can't take them until we have it in hand but since there is no one else to take them right now, they'll have to wait for us.

At all times, we have the option to say 'no' to a placement. With that said, we have thought and prayed about it all weekend. At times we looked at each other and said, "there is no way we are ready to take 2 kids at 2 different life stages! We've never been parents before...this is way over our head." Other times we looked at each other and said "how can we say no? We want to be parents. God has been a God of the curve ball all year so far. Our plans may not be God's plans" Lord give us wisdom! Seriously.

As of this morning, we have decided we will take these precious babies. I can't imagine why someone would want to give up their baby and toddler but we are grateful for the opportunity to be parents. Now things can always change between now and when we have our license in hand. The parents may change their mind, someone else may come along to can take the babies sooner then we can...we don't know. We do know that if they are still available when we have our license, we will welcome them into our home as our kids as long as the Lord will allow.

If I think about it too much the overwhelming thoughts flood in. I know if the Lord wants this to happen, He will give us the strength and wisdom to do this. We will have to be wholly dependent on the Lord for this. Most of the time we wouldn't have this much time to think about it but since our license hasn't come yet, we are grateful we had a weekend to make a decision.

Hopefully I'll get more information tomorrow and can start preparing accordingly. I want to let you know that it is our desire to keep any foster or adopted kids' story just for them. We have read from several expert in the fields that it's best not to share your kid's story with the anyone but the child so they have a sense of ownership of who they are and where they came from. So with that said, I'll share with you what I can but there are many questions you will have that I won't be able to answer for that reason. When any of our kids are old enough, they can share what they wish with whoever they want but we want them to have that ownership.

We would covet your prayers as we prepare and wait. It could potentially be a long week or two now that we know there are 2 precious kids waiting for us to get our license.

Stay-at-home-wife

2009-04-21T21:37:00.003-05:00

Today is my first official day as a stay-at-home-wife and I LOVE it! Well, yesterday was really the first official day but Chase took the day off for his bday so we spent the day in Fort Worth. I know it's hard to believe but neither of has ever been to FW! Chase loves zoo's so I planned a trip to the zoo, a picnic lunch at the botanical gardens, and dessert at the Cheesecake Factory. Side note: there is nothing in cheesecake that is on my diet but I decided to cheat for hubby's bday...bad idea. I didn't feel so hot this morning. I was so tired and groggy. The cheesecake was good but not worth the way I felt this morning. As of last Thursday, I've lost 9 lbs!!! I've been on this diet 4 weeks exactly. I feel so much better and the changes just keep coming.

I've got a lot to do so I won't be bored for quite some time. There is a lot to do when trying to start your own business, even when it's going to be a really small business. I have to get my food handling certificate which requires a 2 day class and test, set up a website, get a logo, create legal documents, get my tax id number...and I'm sure I'm missing a few things. I would like to have everything done as soon as possible so I can start making some mullah. I've got several big cakes on the books for June so I need to be official at the latest by then, Which should happen even if there are a few glitches.

My mother-in-law is visiting us late next week and then my sister comes the week after that. My mother-in-law has only been here for the wedding so I'm excited to show her what our life is like.

All of our foster stuff was sent to Waco today. It got held up in the Dallas office because the director was out sick all last week. So we should now be getting our license sometime next week. I'll let you know when we get it!

Prepping for baby

2009-04-17T10:52:00.004-05:00

I am now a stay-at-home wife! And hopefully soon to be stay-at-home mom. I finished up my last week at work. It was bitter-sweet, but I must say probably more on the sweet side. I'll miss seeing everyone on a daily basis but since Chase still works here, I know I'll see them all from time to time.

We painted the second room last week. It's a light mosey-lime green. If we get a girl, we can add some pink, and if we get a boy, we can add some blue.

We still haven't gotten our license in the mail yet. We are expecting it sometime next week. I'll let you know as soon as we get it!

I got my first baby gift from a co-worker today! Here's a picture.

I had a bad dream last night. I dreamt that we had a foster baby for an entire year and on the baby's 1-year birthday the birth mom came to get her child back. It was so sad and heart-breaking. I am 80% thrilled beyond words to start this new journey and 20% scared to death that something like this dream will come to fruition. We are constantly praying that Lord will prepare our hearts for whatever may come and that we can be grateful for each day we have.

As soon as we get the nursery put together I'll take some pics and post them.

Weekend Happenings

2009-04-07T12:41:00.004-05:00

We are DONE with EVERYTHING for foster!!!! This past weekend we had our home study which was our final 'check' on the lengthy 'to do' list. It took right at 3 hours. They asked us every question possible about each of our history's and how we plan on disciplining our foster child. We have been listening to a lot of Karyn Purvis so that helped tremendously with some of the tricky questions. Karyn is a child development prof at TCU who specializes in 'children who come from hard places', i.e. lots of adoptive and foster kiddo's. She is a wonderful godly woman and I really recommend her book, "The Connected Child" to ALL parents. It will take 1-2 weeks to process everything and send our license to us and then the real waiting begins.

I'll let you all know AS SOON as we get a baby. BUT I can't post pictures, use their real name, or tell you their story via the internet, foster rules. When all the adoption paper work is signed then we can share all of that info online. So, if you would like to see the baby or know all the details, you'll have to come visit which we would love! For all of you who live far far away, you can at least call me and I'll tell you what I can.

I did a weigh in this morning. It's officially been 2 weeks since I started this crazy life style change. I've lost 5.5 lbs in just 2 weeks! I have not exercised at ALL the last couple weeks. I'll be picking that up again here soon. I've gained 20 lbs since getting married 3 years ago. 15 of that was from the horrible treatments I was on that I never lost. So I am thrilled to see some of that coming off. Again, the goal is NOT weight loss, it's to get my body to a place where it can heal itself. I really feel like a new person since starting all of this. I have SO much more energy. I don't feel like I'm dependent on caffeine to get me through the day. I'm so much more productive at work and I don't feel like I have to be a sleep by 9 every night. If that is the only benefit from doing all of this, then this whole process has been well worth it.

Hoops and yoyo cake

2009-04-03T08:53:00.002-05:00

I did this cake about a year ago for a co-workers birthday. She is obsessed with Hoops and Yoyo. If you have no idea who Hoops and Yoyo are, click here.

Naturopathic doctor update

2009-04-01T21:06:00.003-05:00

Last Monday and Tuesday I went to Tulsa OK to see Dr. Joel Robbins who is a Naturopathic doctor. You can read more about why I went here. The results were fascinating but a little overwhelming. His approach to all diseases is drastically different than modern medicine. He is a believer and believes that God created our body to be the ultimate healer but we've hindered our bodies from doing so by putting 'toxins' (processed food) into it. He ran a bunch of tests and determined what vitamins and minerals my body was having a hard time absorbing and did some allergy tests to find out what food I'm allergic to.

My body has a hard time absorbing calcium, magnesium, vit C, all the B complexes, and folic acid. The latter 2 may explain why I keep miscarrying.

I'm allergic to wheat, rice, barley, msg, almonds, sunflowers, hazelnuts, all cow dairy except butter, artificial sweeteners...and I think I'm forgetting something.

My jaw dropped when I read this extensive list. My next question was "what CAN I eat?" I'm on a pretty strict diet and on several supplements. The goal is to get off the supplements within 6 months as my body starts to recognize the minerals and vitamins through food. He will re-test the food allergies in 6 months to see if I can start adding the wheat back in my diet.

I learned a lot while I was at the clinic. The tests were done all day Monday but I had some down time in between so I read a couple of his books. No, I'm not a ridiculously fast reader, the books were just really short. Apparently our body absorbs the most nutrients through juices. Part of my diet includes juicing fruits and veggies twice a day. I'm still getting used to the veggie juice...it's not my favorite. But the fruit juice is amazing! We got a nice juicer since we're needing to juice so much.

As you can imagine it's been an interesting week and a half. My sweet hubby had decided to join me on this new diet and is doing much better at the veggie juice than I am. We have to majorly plan ahead now. Like last night we were at our last foster class and I knew they would provide dinner. We had to plan ahead and bring our own with us instead of enjoy the pizza with everyone else. My cloths are already fitting looser and I think I've dropped 3 or 4 pounds. Crazy!

The goal is not to loose weight (although that will be an added perk), it's to get rid of this endo! He really thinks that if my body isn't trying to fight all the toxins I've been putting into for all these years then it will be able to fight the endo. He see's a lot of cancer patients come through and has see huge successes. It's not a quick fix but hopefully it will fix the issue longer than 9 months like a surgery. What do I have to loose besides a few pounds?

Last week was SO tough. We would come home from work and be asleep by 8:30 every night. This week has been MUCH better. We both have a lot more energy and I'm feeling more alert then ever. I'll keep you updated on this new journey. If you have any good veggie juice recipes, PLEASE pass them on!

Busy Busy Week

2009-03-30T15:58:00.003-05:00

We are completely wrapping up everything we have to get done for foster this week. Here's a picture of what this week looks like for us....

Monday: Breakfast on the Go Event (for Apt. Life)
Fire Inspection (Foster process)
Work a full day
CR

Tuesday: Fingerprints appt. for background check (Foster process)
Work a full day
Session 3 Class (Foster process)
Put up flyer's (Apt. Life)

Wednesday: Health Inspection (Foster process)
Work a full day
Welcome visits (Apt. Life)

Thursday: Fire Inspection part 2 (Foster process)
Work a full day
Take pictures of our apt (Foster process)
Relax???

Friday: Work a full day
Clean like crazy for Home Study! (Foster process)
Flyer (Apt. Life)

Saturday: Home Study (THE LAST THING FOR FOSTER! YAY)
Help a co-worker move
Prep for event (Apt. Life)
Sunday: Church
Sammie Event (Apt. Life)

After all of this, next week will be a breeze! It's all the stuff we have to do really early in the morning before work that's going to get to me. We can see the light at the end of the tunnel now so we are motivated to finish strong.

We did some garage saling on Saturday. It was really cold but well worth it. We now have a car seat, a crib, and bottles! I LOVE garage sales! I think if we had a baby tomorrow we'd at least be able to make it a few days before needing to buy things.

Thanks for all your comments you left on the previous post. They all mean a lot to us!

Foster Parents!...Almost

2009-03-26T13:25:00.003-05:00

I've been wanting to write about this for MONTHS but I couldn't until I let my work know what was going on.

About 6 months ago we started looking into adopting. We looked at everything available, private domestic, private agency domestic, international, and foster-to-adopt. We met with a couple who heads up Tapestry, an adoption and foster ministry, at Irving Bible Church. They have walked through this process with hundreds of families and are a wealth of information.

For this first adoption we've decided to go the foster route which is by far the most 'risky' and complicated but it's where we feel the Lord wants us right now. The process to be licensed foster parents is rather lengthy and involved a slew of things including lots of paperwork, classes, various inspections, the home study, and a ton of random things (like putting a thermometer in your refrigerator....). Everything will be finished by the 4th and then it will take about a week to get our license in the mail to make us official. At that point, we wait. How long? Only God's knows.

The agency we are working with primarily gets infants from women in prison who deliver while incarcerated. Since our heart is to adopt and not necessarily be a revolving door, we have put a few limitations on what kids we will take. We do not care what about the gender or race, in fact, I've always wanted a 'rainbow' family. It is very possible that in just 2 1/2 short weeks, we could have a baby in our home. Crazy! But then again, it could be months and we are totally willing to wait.

We worked on clearing out our second bedroom several weeks ago to make room for a nursery of sorts. We are only getting the vary basics for now because we have no idea if we are getting a boy or girl or even when we are getting a child. We don't know if the first one we get will actually become adoptable or if we'll have to through several babies. There are so many unknowns so we'll just have to take it one step at a time and trust the Lord big time! Some sweet friends gave us their changing table and stroller. We still need to get a crib, bottles, and a car seat at the minimum before April 10. We will get a call one day and need to pick up the infant that same day so there isn't much wiggle room to collect stuff.

We are thrilled and excited for this new adventure. I start to get a little anxious when I think about all the unknowns. I'm scared to give up a baby after we've had them in our home for 6 months or more. I'm selfishly sad that we can't plan much for this child, pick out nursery colors, have lots of baby showers, experience a birth. But I know the Lord has us going in this direction for a reason and we have longed to be parents for a long time now. Please pray for my heart during this journey. I have no idea what to expect and desire to trust the Lord and rest in Him through it all...whatever may come.

I gave my 2 week notice today. I'll be finished April 10. I've offered to work 1/2 days the following week unless we get a call with a baby. I'll still need to bring in some income during this time so I'm officially getting my cake business up and running. I found a commercial kitchen to work out of and will be getting my food handling licence soon. This means I can actually start charging for my cakes!!! The business name will be 'Cake Me Bakery'. I'm working on a website, logo, and business plan. If you need a cake or know someone who needs one, let me know!!! I've got several to do next month and a couple wedding cakes to do this summer.

I've got more to update you all on soon but this post is already lengthy. I'll let you digest all of this before the rest comes.

It's Baaack!

2009-03-12T15:00:00.003-05:00

...my endometriosis. Yuck. No fun, pain. My last surgery was May '08, less than a year ago. I felt a million times better after that surgery. Virtually pain free for a good 6 months. It was amazing...and apparently, short lived. Granted, the pain is NOWHERE close to what it was pre-surgery #1. I've been slowly feeling it the last couple months. About 2 months ago I woke up in the middle of the night and had what I call an "episode," where the pain is so bad it wakes me up...ask Chase, it takes a LOT to wake me up! Yesterday morning I had another bought of horrible pain and stayed home for 1/2 a day until the strong pain killer kicked in.

A friend told me about a doctor in Tulsa, OK I'm going to check out next week. His name is Dr. Joel Robbins. He's a strong believer who got really frustrated in his early medical career because he had been taught to treat the symptoms, not the root issues. He took some time to study on his own and is now one of the leaders in the naturopathic field. I'll be there for 2 days. The first will be running various tests and the second day he will go over all the results and prescribe a treatment plan. He'll start with changes to my diet and supplements.

All I know is that there is no way I'm going back on the horrible treatments I was on a year ago and I'm not ready to do another surgery. So I'm going to try a different route all together. I hope he can help. It's really getting discouraging.

Beautiful Baja and Party

2009-02-19T10:46:00.006-06:00

I'm sitting on a couch, watching food network, and listening/watching the waves crash on the rocks below the condo. It's AH-mazing! Chase is out getting us coffee at this little coffee house called Cha Cha's and it's WAY better than Starbucks. Oh, and when he gets back we are heading to the spa. We have slept at least 10 hours a night AND taken a nap every day. THIS is what I call a vacation! It is breath-taking here. I'll post lots of pics when we get back.

Last Friday Chase threw me a surprise party! It was crazy. I had NO idea. We were flyering for an event on Saturday which is how Chase got me to building 3 where our beautiful club room is. When I looked through the window, I said "Why is there food here?". Then the lights went on, a loud 'surprise' was yelled, and the happy bday song followed. It took me a minute to realize what was going on. When the "surprise" was sounded, I told Chase, "Oh no, we walked into someones surprise party!" HA! It was MY surprise party! There was 30 people there!

Oh, I forgot to mention that I cried. Yep. I had been so frusterated with Chase the entire day because he was acting really weird and wouldn't tell me what was going on. That on top of a stressful and exhausting week, I was really emotional. The party was great. I felt so loved. Thanks to everyone who came out! I REALLY appreciate you.

BDay Extravaganza!

2009-02-11T11:10:00.004-06:00

Yep, today is my birthday. I love birthdays! Random trivia, I share my birthday with Jennifer Aniston who turned 40 today. Chase gets home from his grandmothers funeral later this afternoon so last night I decided to make my own birthday cupcakes....I know I know, you aren't suppose to make your own bday cake. (ready? long run on sentence/tangent coming...) BUT, I've been wanting to try this flavor combo for a REALLY long time but I never make cake for myself, I'm always making it for other people and no one ever wants to risk their cake with a crazy flavor...they want the normal white, yellow, chocolate, or sometimes carrot cake with butter cream....bor-ing. Actually, those are really good cakes but after making them over and over again, I want try something new!

So, I love lemon cake, but not your normal lemon cake. It's basically a french vanilla cake with a hint of lemon. Also I LOVE mascapone cheese and raspberry so I decided to make a raspberry mascopone frosting. So you're asking, 'what in the world is MASCAPONE cheese???' It's the Italian version of cream cheese. It is softer and smoother than cream cheese and has a hint of nut flavor. You've probably had it before and didn't even realize it. It's in authentic tirimisu. If you've never had it, you HAVE to try it! Go now, Run! Walmart even carries it now in their international cheese section.

Baby Benjamin Cake

2009-02-11T11:06:00.003-06:00

I have a friend from church, Leslie, who recently had a baby, Benjamin. I brought her a cake after they got home from the hospital. It is a french vanilla cake with lemon cream cheese filling, covered in buttercream.

Soon, very soon...

2009-02-05T14:31:00.002-06:00

We will be relaxing at the pool and beach below.... Yes, we are going on a much needed vacation! Baja Mexico, here we come! I can't wait!!!

Jackson pics!

2009-02-02T13:11:00.006-06:00

...Where to start

2009-01-31T23:25:00.003-06:00

When it rains, it pours!!! Life has taken a few interesting turns all in the last week. I'll write about them later but none of them have been easy. Thank goodness the Lord sustains us and takes our burdens.

I was finally able to talk to Dr. H about the miscarriage. I'm a huge fan of that man! He is so compassionate and tender. He suggested I go in for extensive blood to work to test for a TON of things and see if anything comes up. So sometime this coming week, I'll go in and get 10 viles of blood taken. It will take a couple weeks to get results but it will be well worth the wait. I've had my fair share of blood work done and I don't really get squeamish about it, HOWEVER, I am a HARD stick. I only have one arm that has any hope and it only has one vain that's worth anything. Many times it takes multiple tries and when they finally do get me, I only produce 1/2 to 1 vile. Sooooo, I'm going to drink a TON of water and eat a HUGE meal before I go and PRAY that I have plenty of blood for them to get.

Emotionally we are doing pretty good now. We are still sad and morn the loss but the Lord has given us an amazing peace. I visited a friend on Friday who just had a baby and was able to hold that baby without any sadness or jealousy. I was thrilled for them and couldn't believe what a miracle it was to be holding a healthy beautiful baby. Children are a blessing and we feel so blessed to have even carried a baby as long as we did. We know that one day we will hold a child in our arms and call it "ours" but really, we are all the Lord's children entrusted to our parents for a short time. Ok, now I'm rambling.

Today I cooked ALL day. I'm doing a cooking demo next so I had to figure out what I was going to do and actually measure and write down what I needed to do. I hardly ever measure, so this was hard. Lindsay came over and took pics as I cooked so I can put together step by step recipes with pictures. I'll post them all here as soon as I compile it all. It was really fun but I now have a new found respect for Pioneer Woman who does this on a daily basis. Crazy!

Final Update

2009-01-29T16:30:00.003-06:00

My doc's nurse called this afternoon. The HcG came back negative for a pregnancy. The good news is that it is not an ectopic pregnancy nor do we have to wait until Monday for closure.

Chase's sweet grandfather sent us an email after he heard and his first sentence was 'What an awesome God we serve!' And he is so right. It is times like this that we hold on to what we know what to be true. God's ways are higher than our, thank goodness!

We are so grateful we were able to celebrate the life He entrusted us with for as long as we did. We still celebrate even though we grieve another loss. We now have 2 children in heaven that we long to meet. We are also grateful that we have friends and family around us to celebrate and grieve with us. We are not alone in this journey.

Update 2

2009-01-28T15:09:00.005-06:00

I just got back from the Dr's office. It doesn't look good. There was no sign of a gestational sac. They took blood and will check levels again on Monday to confirm what they think. I have a slightly higher risk of having an ectopic pregnancy due to how much endometriosis I have in my abdomen so they are keeping a close eye on that.

I am of course very sad and emotional. The hardest part is that we don't know for certain. It's like 99% sure we miscarried but it can't be confirmed until Monday. My doc has been out of town (today I saw one of his partners) and get's back to the office tomorrow. He is an amazing doctor and I'm sure he'll call me when the blood work comes back. Chase is almost home, thank goodness.

Thanks for all your prayers. We are so blessed.

Update

2009-01-28T08:40:00.003-06:00

Thanks for all your prayers. I was finally able to sleep around 1AM and actually fairly well. The bleeding has only gotten worse and is starting to get painful. Dallas is completly iced over today and the Dr's office isn't open yet. Chase will probably be let go at noon so he will be home around 3ish. At this point it doesn't look good but I serve a God of miracles, so I am still hopeful. I am just so grateful we have been able to celebrate this life as long as we have and we pray that we can continue.

Scared

2009-01-27T18:29:00.002-06:00

It's Tuesday night and I'm bleeding heavily now. Chase is still gone. Please pray for our baby and pray for our hearts no matter what the outcome. I'll go to the doc tomorrow morning.

E

Prego update

2009-01-24T11:54:00.001-06:00

My HcG levels doubled within 48 hours which is exactly what it's suppose to do! Our baby is growing! PTL!!! I've had issues with my progesterone being extremely low so I've taken Prometrium the second half of the month for a couple months now. The first round of blood work showed my progesterone was 24 which was AMAZING for me but the second round showed it plummeted to 13, which is not good. The doc has doubled the amount of Prometrium I'm taking in hopes of making that number rise! Unless I feel like something is wrong, I don't have to go back until Feb. 13 and I'll have my first sonogram!

So far I haven't experienced any nausea or heartburn. The last pregnancy, that all kicked in around 6 weeks. However, I have been extremely tired. I've been going to bed around 9 every night! Last night I got 12 hours of sleep but I'm still exhausted. I am not complaining at all, just documenting my pregnancy. Actually, I was telling Chase this morning that since I'm not nauseous yet, I don't really feel pregnant. This sounds weird but I'm almost looking forward to when I am nauseous because then I'll know that I'm pregnant. With our last pregnancy, I knew something was wrong when I woke up one morning and wasn't nauseous anymore.

News!

2009-01-21T14:28:00.000-06:00

We're PREGNANT!!! We found out Monday night. I was in such disbelief I took 3 tests in a 5 minute span. We are thrilled and at times speechless. My obgyn is out of town for a couple weeks so I went to my general practicioner to get the blood work done. She knows our history and said, "couples in your situation shouldn't tell anyone until you've made it past the first trimester." She is only wanting to protect us but this last year and half have given us much perspective on children and 'our situation.' We don't know what the future holds but the Lord does and we rest in Him. Our desire is to celebrate this life that the Lord has entrusted us with, no matter how long or short that may be.

We had started down the adoption road and were excited about the possibilites that it could bring. We are still going to learn as much as we can about adoption so we can hopefully use that information in the future.

I'll keep you all posted on my progress. For now, we would appricate your prayers. Our desire is to be able to hold a baby in 36 weeks but we desire even more to have the children that the Lord wants us to have. We are both overjoyed and will cherish all the time we have.

More Wedding Cakes

2009-01-04T14:52:00.001-06:00

Wedding Cakes

2009-01-01T22:51:00.000-06:00

It's wedding cake weekend! Here are 2 pics for now and I'll post 2 others later this weekend.

Happy Anniversary!

2008-12-31T10:37:00.000-06:00

December 30, 2008 marks 3 years of marriage for Chase and I. We went to the Cheesecake Factory for a dinner, yummo! Chase has something else planned for this weekend but he won't tell me what. We had a great conversation about this past year and the year to come. Our marriage has had by far the most growth this past year. What's the difference between this year and the 2 prior? Community. We have realized that left to our own devices we make bad decisions and are selfish. When you surround yourself with a community that is intimately involved in your life, it's a lot harder to fail.

Chase, I love you. Thank you for constantly pursuing me, being an amazing servant leader in our family, and having such a teachable heart. I look forward with great anticipation to see what the Lord will bring us through in the years to come.

First Class!

2008-12-31T10:27:00.000-06:00

You can read about our traveling saga a couple posts down. Long story short, we got bumped to first class on one of our flights. This pictures isn't very good but you can get a general idea. I had veggie ravioli with grilled zucchini in a marinara sauce. A side salad, a roll, and flourless chocolate cake. And we can't forget about the REAL silverware! They also served complimentary wine, beer, and liquor. I stuck with the water since I wasn't feeling well.

It was nice to be bumped up to first class but I would NEVER pay for it. You pay severl hundred more for a little more leg room and a meal? This meal was pretty good but not worth a couple hundred dollars.

Graduation Cake

2008-12-31T10:22:00.000-06:00

One of our good friends, Chewy (aka Chris), just graduated from UTD and is going into the construction business. I gladly made a cake for his big day. The bottom cake is chocolate with cream cheese filling and covered in butter cream. The top cake is a vanilla cake with raspberry and lemon cream cheese fillings and covered in butter cream. The tools, small hard hat, and diploma are made out of white chocolate. The large hard hat is sculpted rice crispy treats covered in fondant.

Things you don't see in Dallas

2008-12-31T10:17:00.000-06:00

While visiting Oregon, I saw a few things that you probably wouldn't see in Dallas.

#3 I opened the car door and found this....3 feet of snow! I couldn't get out of that side and had to crawl to the other side to get out.

#2 Snow in a shopping cart INSIDE a grocery store.

#1 A wood bear sitting on a toilet, yes a real toilet, in the front yard.

This won us $50...

2008-12-31T10:13:00.000-06:00

We went to a Christmas party ealier this month and they had a Christmas hat contest. Chase won and we got a $50 gift card to the Cheesecake Factory. Yum!

Christmas Traveling Saga

2008-12-31T09:37:00.000-06:00

When the weather outside is frightful, airports can become less then delightful. Actually, our little saga had nothing to do with the weather but with mechanical issues. Let me back up a bit and say that I started getting sick the day after we arrived in Oregon and despite the meds and lots of vitamin C it only got worse. We left Oregon for the airport at 7am, drove for 4 hours to Boise, got on our plane and landed in Minnesota at 5:30pm. We got on our next flight that was only slightly delayed and headed home...just kidding! We got about 1/4 of the way to DFW when the we heard, "Ladies and gentleman, this is your captain speaking. We are having mechanical issues and need to go back to Minnesota. We'll be there in about 25 minutes." About 25 minutes later we heard, "We need to burn off some fuel before we land so we are going to fly around the city for about 50 minutes before we land." Long story short, by the time we landed back in Minnesota it was 10:20. We were originally scheduled to arrive at DFW by 10:05, very frusterating. They had another plane waiting for us when we landed but it wasn't going to get to DFW until 1:30AM. By then, I wasn't feeling well at all and just wanted to sleep. My wonderful hubby decided to ask if they would put us up in a hotel and get us on another flight the next day. They ended up putting us up in a nice hotel, giving us food vouchers, AND upgrading us to first class for the flight the next day!

Our flight didn't take off until 5pm so we had all day to kill time. Chase had never been to the Mall of America so that's where we headed. This was my third time to go and I still can't get over how big the place is. It's HUGE!

They have a store there that I just HAD to go see. Have you ever heard of Prairie Home Companion? No??? I grew up on this stuff! Now most kids grow up listening to sing-a-long tapes or Disney radio, not us. We listened to stories about Lake Wobegon with Garrison Kiellor. My dad loved this stuff. He could listen to it for hours. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, click HERE, and you'll get a little insight to my early years. All that to say, the show is in Minneapolis and the Mall of America has store full of PHC t-shirts, Kiellor books, and CD's. My dad would be in heaven. This post is for you dad!

Side Note: I was the only person under the age of 55 in the store....

Below is a random pic of us in front of Kokomo restaurant in the mall.

Baby Andrew Cake

2008-12-31T09:31:00.000-06:00

My cousin-in-law is about to have her third baby and I was asked to make a cake for a baby shower the day after Christmas. Congrats Nikki on another blessing from the Lord! I can't wait to meet baby Andrew.

Christmas perspective from Iraq

2008-12-17T14:25:00.001-06:00

Wow. I just received an email from a dear friend who went to college with Chase. He currently is deployed to Iraq. He sent us an email that was powerful. It gives a much needed perspective on the meaning of Christmas. It's well worth the read. Thank you for sharing Robert!

As I celebrate this Christmas in Iraq it is difficult to think of the birth of Christ as anything but the most bold sneak attack in the history of history. The same God who who trades twenty-two thousand soldiers for three hundred, would now dare to plan an invasion of earth in the form of a young woman, a Godly but little known man named Joseph, and a baby. Trusting these parents to raise and care for God who in this incredible plan shared in their humanity so that by his death he might destroy him who holds the power of death-that is, the devil-and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death.

As I read the description of angels who destroy thousands of Assyrian warriors in a single night, every first born child and animal in Egypt, and certainly the rider on the white horse with eyes of blazing fire and a sword which comes out of his mouth to destroy the nations I can think of a few other options I might choose for an invasion of earth. Yet God in his sovereign plan and infinite wisdom chose a baby who wins the war, conquers death, and then leaves the responsibility to tell the rest of the world that the enemy has been defeated to the least likely candidates He could have chosen. Somehow those who were faithless, through Him became faithful and have brought us the same mission today.

I of course will miss being home with all of you during this holiday season. It is certainly a special time to be with family and friends, but if I must be away I am thankful that it is because God has chose to give me a role in the invasion that began two thousand years ago with a baby. Pray that I who so often have been faithless would through Him be faithful to the calling He has given me. I do need to thank everyone who has encouraged me through emails, letters, and care packages. It encourages me to hear God's work in your lives, and to hear how you are living out His calling in your own lives.

As a chaplain section we will of course have a lot going on during this next week and you can pray for the Christmas production put on by our Gospel choir, for all of the the Bible Studies going on including the WWF "Weekly Word Fellowship", our Christmas Eve and Day services, and even the Christmas movie marathon we are hosting. The plan is for our new chapel to be open, at least for one day and so I also would ask you to pray that the construction still needed is completed and we are able to move in and dedicate the building on Christmas Eve. Finally as important as events can be, pray for individual Soldiers, by name if you know them, that during this Christmas those who know Christ would have the peace that the King has come and conquered. For those who do not know Jesus pray that this would be the year they respond to the savior they have never know as their own. I wish you and all your families a Merry Christmas and pray that you are able to celebrate the invasion of our Lord. I pray that we would invite Him to invade each of our lives in a special way this Christmas.
God Bless

Things the Lord is teaching me

2008-12-11T14:17:00.000-06:00

I've been hesitant to post about this because it is so controversial, especially among Christians. I post the following links in much love and with the intent to inform so that you can know what I wished I had known 3 years ago. When I've brought up this topic with some, it has been met with disbelief so instead of me trying to explain, I'm just going to post links so that others can do a much better job of explaining what the Lord has been showing me. Please please please go to these links, listen, read, and then bring it before the Lord.

You can download the entire book (which is actually really short) on the right side of this sight for free.
http://www.epm.org/books/does_the_birth_control_pill_cause_abortionsDetail.php

This is a video from a professor at Southwestern Theological Seminary.
http://www.swbts.edu/dashboard.cfm?dateString=20081007&dateToLoad=October%2007,%202008

Finally, to bring it all home listen to Voddie Baucham.
http://www.voddiebaucham.org/vbm/Podcast/Entries/2007/1/17_The_Centrality_of_the_Home.html

If you want other links, I've got a lot. These are just the three that sum it up the best.

Crazy Texas Weather

2008-12-10T09:07:00.000-06:00

There is a phrase that goes something like, "If you don't like the weather in Texas, wait 5 minutes." This phrase is only a slight exaggeration. This past weekend it was gorgeous! Low 70's sunny, perfect. Monday seemed to continue this pattern until about 1pm when the temperature dramatically dropped. We ended the night with a short but powerful storm that brought funnel clouds and a tornado about an hour north of us.

This morning the temperature while we were working out was a blistery 26 degrees but felt like 17 with the wind. BRRRR! Thank goodness Ally had us in the parking garage running stairs.

Rumor has it by this weekend it will be in the 70's again. I don't know how true that is, but it wouldn't surprise me. We got married December 30, 2005 and it was in the high 60's that day! Texas keeps our wardrobes on its toes!

I. Love. Camp. Gladiator!...

2008-12-05T10:42:00.000-06:00

...This is something you can hear 35 crazy Dallasites shouting as we do jumping jacks outside at 5:30AM in the middle of DECEMBER! This morning it was 32 degrees! BRRRRR!

Confession, I haven't really worked out since I left my job at Life Time Fitness a year and a half ago. I've done the occasional spinning class but absolutly nothing consistant. Chase has tried his best to motivate me but I can be stuborn and have fought back everytime he encouraged me to get up and work out.

Have you ever seen the tv show American Gladiator? It was on years ago and started back up maybe 2 or 3 seasons ago? Anyway, the winner of season 2, Ally, goes to Watermark and has started doing boot camps. She offers a few different times and places and they normally run for 4 weeks. When I first heard about it, 4 weeks seemed really intimidating. For December she is doing a 2 weeker, due to the holidays, which seemed a lot more doable. I can do anything for 2 weeks right? Yes. I. Can!

Click HERE to see her website. We (Chase and I plus our good friends Chewy and Lindsay) get up at 4:40AM, out the door at 5, arrive at Watermarks parking lot at 5:15 to strech, and begin at 5:30. It's an hour of intense short sprints or drills that build endurance, tone, and improve cardio. Honestly, I can't believe I'm doing this. I've NEVER been athletic nor wanted to be. We started on Monday and I've already noticed a big difference in my endurance and I am SO sore the next day...which I'm told is a good thing. There is a 71 year old woman doing it with us and if she can do it, I have NO excuse not to push through.

Tea Time!

2008-12-03T16:40:00.000-06:00

Mom's best friend, Pam, is in town for a visit so mom took us to tea at the Chocolate Angel. We had a great time! Here are a few pics.
Above we have cheese with pimento sandwiches, cucumber sandwiches, a Gruyere and ham croissant, curry chicken salad in a philo dough mini bowl, a cranberry scone, and mixed fruit with poppy seed yogurt dressing. Oh, and English black tea of course!

Above we have a delicious dark chocolate mouse (in the mini cup), a sugar cookie, dark chocolate brownie, and a strawberry.

Above: Grace, Pam, Mom, Me

Thanksgiving for 60

2008-11-24T09:16:00.000-06:00

Yep, 60 adults. We had a Thanksgiving feast at our apartment complex this weekend and planned on feeding 60. We had about 50 residents come so we have a little bit left over, but not much. I went to 3 different grocery stores on Saturday morning in order to keep the cost as low as possible. We get a monthly budget for apartment life so it didn't come out of our pocket but we still had to keep cost low.

We got the cost down to $2.50 per person which is pretty incredible for all the food we had. Below is the menu and then the shopping list...just in case you ever have to do Thanksgiving for 60.

Menu:
Turkey
Stuffing
Mashed Potatoes
Green Bean Casserole
Sweet Potato Casserole
Cranberry Sauce
Rolls (mom brought them so they are not on the shopping list)
Pumpkin Pie
Devil Food Cheese Cake
Lemonade
Coffee

Shopping List:
2, 18lb Turkeys (...I got a few funny looks at Sprouts when I was purchasing 2 huge turkeys)
12 sticks of butter
6 boxes of Stove Top Stuffing
15 lbs of potatoes
6 large bags of frozen green beans
6 cans of cream of mushroom soup
5 onions
1 large tub of mushrooms
12 garlic cloves
2 large tubs of fried onions
8 cups of grated cheese
12 lbs of sweet potatoes
Brown sugar
Cinnamon
3 cups of chopped pecans
Marshmallows
5 cans of cranberry sauce
2 cans of pumpkin puree
2 cans evaporated milk
Ground ginger
2 pie crusts
1 Devil Food Cake box
3 packages of cream cheese
Dutch cocoa
Bittersweet chocolate
Melting Chocolate

EXCITING Life Update!!!!

2008-11-18T10:56:00.000-06:00

Sometimes timing is humorous. Chase got home last night with some great news. There is a newer woman in his unit that actually wants to take his place for the April mission!!!! What does this mean? Chase is now the alternate NOT the primary. There is still a possibility that he would go, IF this lady backs out or IF they find out that she isn't elligable. Otherwise, he is off the hook!!! This is such a burden lifted. This weekend was full of roller coaster emotions for me for a coule reasons, but it ended with great emotions! PTL!

Life Update

2008-11-16T21:04:00.000-06:00

When I first posted about Chase's deployment there was a small chance that another guy from his unit would take his place. We learned this last weekend that the small chance has been depleted to no chance. It's official, Chase will leave in April for at least 6 months. There are a lot of un-knowns that won't be known until he gets there. We don't know if we'll be able to see each other even though he's only 3 hours away.

Chase gets back tomorrow after being away for 5 days with the Army. We haven't talked to each other at all and it's been HARD! Normally we can at least have a few conversations while he's gone but between a busy schedule on his part and horrible cell phone reception, there has been no communication. Grrrr. I will be extremely grateful to have him home tomorrow night.

I have a few friends who are military wives and their hubby's have been deployed overseas. Every time Chase is gone I gain more and more respect and appreciation for the sacrifice the entire family makes. To all the wives, thank you for supporting your husband as he serves. I only know on a small level what it's like...and it's not easy.

PA Distribution Center-People, Scenery, Food

2008-11-11T10:07:00.000-06:00

The Pennsylvania Distribution Center is the place where GAiN receives and sends it's humanitarian aid. Twice a year, we have a work project where thousands of volunteers come and help us process the aid. This year we had over 5,000 volunteers over the span of 9 days. They helped us process new and used clothing, medical supplies, shoes, school supplies, toys, and blankets. It was a lot of work but it was a blast!

People-

The first picture encompasses about a third of the DC...as you can see, there were a lot of people and even more stuff to process! I did a bunch of tours for groups as they came in for the first time and I told them that this DC contains a lot of stuff...but this stuff is used as a tool to meet physical needs so that ultimately we can meet spiritual needs.

We process thousand of blankets.

This is my friend and co-worker, Melissa, who was with the kids the entire project. She helped the kids tie gospel bead bracelets around the necks of TY beanie babies.

Mr. Dave is in charge of GAiN's water initiative. He set up a display at the PDC to help volunteers gain (ha! no pun intended) a glimpse of the worlds water issues. Did you know that over 6,000 children die every day from water related illnesses?

The first day I was at the PDC, I ran into this familiar family! Eric discipled Chase in college. They are on staff with Campus Crusade for Christ and now live in PA doing ministry. I had NO idea they were going to be there, and they had no idea I even worked for GAiN!

Scenery-

Our (GAiN staff) lodging was provided by people in the community who opened up their homes to us for 10 days. Myself, Melissa, and 3 other woman stayed with a wonderful couple who were involved in the Church of the Brethren (similar to Mennonites). They live very simply, make the most amazing food, and are a true delight to be around. The couple we stayed with has small crop of neck-pumpkins (they pronounced it puN-kins). Mr. Shirk raved about neck-pumpkins and how much better they are for 'pun-kin' pie. They sold their small crop in their shed. They kept a money box in the shed and placed a sign in front that read 'Neck Pumpkins $2 each, on the honor system.'

The next 2 pictures were taken right outside the PDC...if you can't tell by the pictures, the PDC was in the middle of no-where PA. Amish farms surrounded the DC, it was incredibly beautiful!

Food!-

I LOVE cultural food! It is one of my passions which is why I shop at so many ethnic grocery stores. Food is normally a large part of a culture so you can learn a lot about someone by understanding the food they eat and how it is prepared.

Below is a picture of Ham Balls.....yep, HAM. Balls. I wasn't too fond of it but at least I tried it. It's composed of shredded ham and a brown sugar type glaze packed tightly into the shape of a ball. It tasted good but had a unique texture that I didn't care for.

This one is a regular plane-Jane hamburger but it was served on a napkin! That's a first for me.

Ok, now for THE best gas station food EVER! I had heard from a couple people that I had to try the pretzel sandwich! As soon as I had an opportunity to get away from the DC, I went straight to Sheetz, a gas station that has AMAZING food!

Dun, dun na na! Behold, the pretzel sandwich! Yuuum Yum!

I also got a side of 3-cheese Mac & Cheese. It was the best gas station mac & cheese I've ever had! Oh, wait, I've never had gas station mac & cheese before Sheetz! It really was very good and creamy.

If your ever in the Lancaster County and see a Sheetz, STOP! Buy a pretzel sandwich! I might have to volunteer again for the PDC just for the opportunity to go to Sheetz.

New Addition to our Family

2008-11-10T15:11:00.000-06:00

No, we're not pregnant, we got a dog!!! I've been researching dog breeds for months now and finally narrowed it down to a labradoodle (lab and standard poodle mix) or a goldendoodle (golden retriever and standard poodle mix). Both breeds have the intelligence and little shedding of the poodle but have the gentle, fun-loving personality of the lab or retriever. They were originally bred to be therapy dogs so they make great pets. There is only one tincy wincey problem....they are expensive!!! Getting one from a decent breeder easily cost $1800, yikes!

About 6 weeks ago I posted a 'labradoodle or goldendoodle wanted' plea on craigslist. We had gotten a few hits but none of them worked out. Last week I got an email from a nice family about Jackson, a 2 year old, 63 lb goldendoodle. They had recently found out that the dad was HIGHLY allergic to the dog so they needed to find him a new home. They got him from a wonderful breeder in Missouri and had him shipped to Texas. He is neutered, up to date on shots, they gave us his crate, 6 months of heart worm and flea meds, collars, leashes, toys, and treats all for FREE! We are stocked! It will be great to have a dog around especially when Chase is deployed.

We were dog sitting for my mom this weekend. She has a 4lb dog and we now have a 63lb dog! It was very entertaining watching them play this weekend!

Cake Week

2008-11-07T14:36:00.001-06:00

Somehow this week started and ended with long nights, early mornings, and cakes! One of our friends turned the big 4-0 Wednesday and the surprise bday party is tonight. It's been a pretty busy week so this one was a pretty fast cake to put together. It's a lot larger than it looks, its a 12" round cake double stacked. One of the commonly asked questions I get regarding cakes is "How long does it take to make?" The 'fast' ones take about 4 hours start to finish. The more colors and fancy fillings you add the longer it takes. Once the cake is assembled, it only takes me 1 - 1.5 hours to frost and decorate. Most of the time is spent baking, making the frosting, coloring the frosting, make fillings, rolling fondant, etc. Some of the more elaborate cakes take me 3-4 hours to decorate, plus the 3-4 hours of baking and assembling.

The cake below is a white vanilla cake with a layer of raspberry and a layer of orange cream cheese fillings with buttercream frosting.

The cake below was for another bday party earlier this week. I really like how this one turned out. I like the texture I was able to do on the bottom layer. I think I'll make this style cake again soon. The roses I made with buttercream. They take about 2 minutes each to make. I made them while the cakes were baking so it didn't any 'extra' time.

Both cakes were white chocolate cake with white chocolate frosting. The bottom cake had raspberry filling and the top cake had a white chocolate mouse filling.....can you tell they like white chocolate?

Halloween Costume

2008-11-07T14:18:00.000-06:00

My creative hubby decided to dress up like his boss for Halloween this year. Don is a wonderful man and a great boss, but he has some quirky fashion. More days than not, Don comes into work wearing shorts (even in the winter months), long dark socks, sandals, and a short sleeve button down. Oh, and let's not forget about the beard without the mustache! Do you see the resemblance?

I'm here, I'm here!

2008-11-03T10:51:00.000-06:00

Whew! It's already November! October went by SO quickly. Sorry I haven't updated this in over 2 weeks. I was out of town for a week and when I got home, it was non-stop craziness. I was in the great state of Pennsylvania in small town Mt. Joy deep in the heart of Amish country. It was gorgeous!!! I have some pics that are on my camera that I left at home today. GAiN's (where I work) distribution center is in Mt. Joy and twice a year we do a work project with volunteers. This year we had over 5,000 volunteers who, over the course of 9 working days, helped us process millions of dollars worth of humanitarian aid that will be shipped out to over 30 countries. I'll be doing several posts in the next couple days about my time there.

One of my good friends' mom past away last week. She died of cancer that was diagnosed only 6 short months ago. I saw the family a couple days before she passed. Death always makes me re-evaluate life, my priorities, my relationship with the Lord, my passions. Chase and I were both honored to be apart of the service. My heart breaks for my friend, her brother, and her father who have lost someone so dear. I am so grateful that God, in His infinite sovereignty, made a way for us, who have rejected Him over and over, to have an intimate relationship with Him and ultimately spend an eternity wholly restored to perfect fellowship.

So the election is tomorrow and I didn't get a chance to early vote. Yep, I'll be standing in a long line with the other 73% of procrastinates. I had intended to vote several different times last week but things kept coming up that need immediate attention. Todd, the pastor at Watermark, did a GREAT job with yesterday's sermon regarding the election. You should listen to it before you vote. Click HERE. He presents a lot of history that I had never considered before. Oh, and while your at it, listen to last weeks sermon on Redemption...wholly cow!...I was in tears by the end.

I've never been good at remembering important dates, until this past year. Every time I see a new Doctor I have to download the past years history with dates and all. Dates of surgery's, dates of treatments, dates, dates, dates. Earlier this week I was thinking about some of last years dates and was reminded that one year ago exactly, we found out we were pregnant. We weren't trying, in fact, I had just had my first surgery so we were shocked! A lots happened this past year...kind of daunting to think about. There are so many lessons learned and so many He is in the middle of teaching me. I know now more than ever that the Lord IS in control and His timing is perfect. I can't control when or if we have a biological child, and that is ok. I know He already knows the children He will entrust us with, its just a matter of time...and I will rest in that.

Stay tuned, pictures of PA coming soon!

Life Update

2008-10-13T23:12:00.000-05:00

It always feels like there's a lot going on in our small world. I heard a quote last week that has rung true in our life lately. "God is the God of curve balls." We found out last week that Chase is scheduled to be deployed in April for at least 6 months. The orders will be cut for 12 months but most likely it will just be 6...hopefully. The GREAT news is that it is NOT overseas, he's being deployed to Oklahoma. Yep, you can be deployed in the states. It's complicated but basically his units mission is to run basic training camps in Oklahoma.

We knew that this was coming down the pike so it wasn't a HUGE shocker but reality is starting to set in. I'm so grateful that I won't have to worry about his safety or even figure out time zones when I want to talk to him. I may even be able to see him once in a while during the deployment.

Logistically, a lot will have to be worked out. We are still trying to have a baby so Lord willing, if we are pregnant (and stay pregnant) before he leaves, I'll most likely have a bambino while he is gone. We will also have to figure out something with Apartment Life. It requires 70 hours a month so I will definitely want someone else to help me out with that.

The Lord is in control and I'm SO grateful for that.

Football Fever

2008-10-13T23:06:00.000-05:00

Chase is a Red Skins fan in Cowboy land...the wrong place to display red. As you are all painfully aware, the Skins beat the Cowboys a couple weeks ago...I know I know, I tried to forget as well. After that game, Chase decided to bring his Skins shirt to work and proudly display it on his chair. Another department got a hold of his shirt and decided to change a few things.

Ha ha ha....potato skins! Clever. Let's take a close look at that helmet...
I love you Chase but this is funny!

Canton Suprises

2008-10-13T22:56:00.000-05:00

I, along with my sister and a friend, went to Canton First Monday Trade days just over a week ago. We had a great time and I was able to stock up on some Christmas gifts.

I'm glad I brought my camera because we saw a few things that made me say, "Really???"

Here we go.
Yes, that is camouflage bikini's and lingerie! We even saw some women actually seriously look at this display....Really????
Beehives. Empty beehives. Hum....for sale. Selling beehives? Really???

Root Beer Tasting

2008-10-13T22:19:00.000-05:00

Something we've been wanting to do for a while is have a root beer tasting contest. We LOVE root beer! There are so many brands of root beer and we wanted to see which brand we liked best. Honestly, I thought they were all similar. Boy was I wrong! They were all distinctively different.

Chris and Lindsay came over to help us figure out the winner. We had a great time! Great to hang out with friends!

Here are the cast of characters....Parkers (the cheap brand), A&W, IBC, Stewarts, Hansens, Mug, and Barqs. Let's see what happens...

Yep, Chris is smelling the root beer. He was very methodical in his approach.

And the winner is????.....More like winnerS. After much agony and full tummies, we came to different conclusions.

Lindsay's by-far winner is.....

Chase's not-so-clear winner is....
And Chris and my VERY clear winner is.....
There you have it folks. I was really hoping that I would like the cheap brand the best...but alas, I like the most expensive! Stewart's was $6 for 4!!!!!

On a side note, Hansens was the EXTREMELY clear LOSER!!!! Yuck! Blah! Spat!!!! It was HORRIBLE! But I guess that's what you can expect from a diet soda.

New Discovery

2008-09-24T16:43:00.000-05:00

Okay, I'm normally the last one to find out about really cool things, mostly websites, but I wanted to pass along my new discovery just in case any of you out there haven't found it yet. I love love love a website called Etsy. This website is a place where individuals can sell there homemade items. They have EVERYTHING! I will be getting most of my Christmas gifts from here. I'm such a sucker for homemade items.

Friends in High Places

2008-09-23T09:18:00.001-05:00

I recently read one of my friends blog about Sammy, who happens to be a mutual friend. I met Sammy the same time I met Chase, on a Campus Crusade for Christ summer project in New Jersey. He has a heart for challenging our generation to do more. Click HERE to hear his story. Thanks for sharing your heart Sammy!

Family Goes to Six Flags

2008-09-22T13:33:00.000-05:00

Chase's brother and sister-in-law, Tony and Melissa, came into town this weekend. Tony is in the army so they were/are moving from North Carolina to El Paso and Dallas just happens to be on the way. They stayed with us a couple nights which was GREAT because I haven't seen them since our wedding...almost 3 years ago! Tony was deployed to Afghanistan for 15 months and returned this past May.

Tony loves roller-coasters so he had the great idea of going to Six Flags. We googled 'six flags promo code' and found one that made the ticket price $24!!! It was a BEAUTIFUL day outside and we walked onto to almost every ride...no lines! We had a great time...well, except for the Texas Giant...you couldn't pay me to go on that ride again. It's the largest wooden roller coaster in the world, and I think it should be re-named something like 'Whip Lash'. The last time I rode it I was in high school and I didn't remember it being that bad. I left the ride with a few bruises!

Chase and Tony deciding where to go next... I believe Batman was next.

Wow, don't they look a TON alike! But guess who's older.......nope, Tony is!

This was Batman for the second time. I like the ride but not enough to do it twice in one afternoon so I opted out.

There they go! Chase, Tony, and Melissa are in the very front.

My hubby and Tony are a sucker for games. I was amazed they only played one the entire day. Read the rules...

...okay, that sounds easy enough. I mean the guy working it did it with no hands! Surely it can't be that bad! Tony's up first...
...LOOK! There's the RED Rung! SO close!...
....Almost there.....wait! I think he's falling left! Oh No!
Okay, now it's Chase's turn. GO HUBBY!!!! Win that fish for me!!!

...getting closer!....

....Look at that determination and focus. But alas, he didn't quit make it....
...Let's take a look at the prize that I didn't get...
There you have it, a big. blue. fish/shark/thing. Bummer! I had a spot for it all picked out...sad face.

Yep, these pic's are still Six Flags.

family, food, and editing

2008-09-18T10:38:00.000-05:00

Family: Life finally slowed down for us a bit this week. Phew! Chase's brother and sister-in-law are coming to town this weekend which I'm really excited about for several reasons. I haven't seen them in almost 3 years, since our wedding!!! Yikes. They live in a land far far away so the only time we would normally see them is at Christmas. Chase's bro was serving in Afghanistan the last time we went to Idaho for Christmas and just got back in May. I'm also excited they are coming because it is forcing us to get the second bedroom together. Got to love deadlines!

Food: Todd, our pastor at Watermark, gave a message called "Why Storehouses are Stupid" this past Sunday. It was a good one and if you missed it, I highly recommend you listen to it. The gist of it was on giving and our heart behind it. Chase and I absolutely LOVE to give. Many times we have the "what if we won the lottery" conversation and dream about how we could give. We love to give things that are important to us, like date nights.

We re-evaluated our budget about a year ago and had to make a really hard decision. We have a TON of student loans...and when I say a ton, I mean a ton. Think of a really big number and add some more. We saw that our giving was actually pretty large but our debt payments weren't much more the minimums. All that to say, through much agony, prayer, and counsel we decided to significantly reduce our giving so that we could make larger debt payments.

After Todd's message on Sunday, Chase had a great idea. We could reduce our grocery money to next to nothing for one month and use that to give. We budget $250 a month for groceries which I'm normally able to do for even less...one time I'll post about all the grocery stores I go to to save money. So our goal for one month would be to live off of $50 for all our groceries. This would mean a lot of oatmeal, beans, and rice. Don't worry, we'll take lots of vitamins to get our needed nutrients.

The reason why I'm even sharing this here is that I need some good beans and rice recipes. Do you have any you can share with me? Or another recipe idea that is really really really cheap to make.

Editing: I've never edited my photos but I'd like to start trying. I don't want to purchase anything yet so photoshop is out. If you know of a free editing website I'd love for you to share that with me.

cupcake fun!

2008-09-15T10:07:00.000-05:00

My boss had a birthday on Friday. Now, I would normally make a full cake like these but I wanted to do something a little different this time. Bakerella makes cupcake pops which are SO adorable so I decided to give it a try. They were a HUGE hit. Here's how they turned out!

FYI, these take a LOT of time!

Apple Pie season

2008-09-15T09:52:00.000-05:00

Last year around this time, we were staying with our friends, the Motl's, because Chase was still drilling in Arkadelphia. Lori decided to make a homemade apple pie which we all devoured in one sitting. We liked it so much, we made another one the next day. I fell in love with homemade apple pies that day... But it does need to be completely homemade, crust and all. I know I know, Chase now calls me "a food elitist". I was at the grocery store and saw some beautiful apples and immediately thought of the fall, the Motl's, and apple pie....yum.

Lindsay came over and help me make it because peeling, coring, and slicing apples takes FOREVER! Here's how it turned out!

Event #3: Lumber Jack Breakfast

2008-09-15T09:37:00.001-05:00

We had a GREAT breakfast event this past weekend! We were a little worried about it since hurricane Ike was scheduled to hit Dallas that afternoon, but it turned out we had nothing to worry about. We served pancakes, bacon, sausage, fruit, bagels, juice, milk, and coffee. Chase and I were able to talk to many of the residents since we had such an awesome team help us. A big thanks to Chrys and Mike for taking some great pictures!

Mail time!

2008-09-09T15:41:00.000-05:00

I got a box in the mail yesterday that I wasn't expecting. Let's find out what I got!

An Immersion Blender!!!!! I'm SOOOOO excited! It got one last year at a garage sale for $3...an that's about all it was worth. Every time I use it, I get so frustrated because it does a horrible job! So I'm officially firing the garage sale blender because I've found it's replacement thanks to my father! This gift arrived just in time for soup season. I love making roasted tomato basil, butter-nut squash, and pumpkin soups during the fall season. YUM! Thanks dad!!!

What do you do when...

2008-09-09T15:33:00.000-05:00

...you have a TON of banana's left over from one of your events??? Make banana bread of course!!!

I learned a new trick while making the bread. If you have bananas that aren't ridiculously ripe, place them on a cookie sheet and pop them in the oven (about 350 degrees) for 10 minutes. The outside will turn completely black but don't worry. This process ripens the banana by bringing out all the natural sugars. Let the bananas cool for a couple minutes and then mash them before incorporating them into the mixture. You will have the best banana bread ever!

Weekend Pics

2008-09-05T23:13:00.001-05:00

My friend, Danielle, is a great photographer and posted a bunch of pics on her blog. Click HERE to see our wonderful time visiting LA. Thanks Danielle, miss you already!!!!

Event #2: Breakfast-On-The-Go

2008-09-03T15:18:00.000-05:00

This morning we had our second event as a Cares team. This one required a lot of prep work but very little work during the event. We stood at the gate and handed out bags with breakfast and later-in-the-day snacks. We also served freshly brewed Starbucks coffee in to-go cups. We prepared 50 bags but only had about 25 cars come through. It was an early morning but was well worth it. With an event like this there is very little relationship building but it gives us a chance to serve our residents in a way that makes them say 'wow, thanks.' I took some pic's for future reference purposes but thought I'd post them here.

Tis' the Season!

2008-09-03T15:03:00.001-05:00

It's that time of year again....NFL starts tonight which means my hubby has been busy with fantasy football. Last night his group did their draft which meant focused time was needed. I think it's kind of neat because his group (there's probably a technical name for this but I don't know what it is...) is a bunch of guys he went to college with who are now spread out all over the states and even one guy serving in Iraq!

Hollywood and Rodeo Dr.

2008-09-02T09:49:00.000-05:00

Chase went to school with James, Joel, David at George Mason University. They were all involved in Crusade and became great friends. Over the last 2 1/2 years they all married wonderful women who have become my friends as well. Actually James and Danielle were on the same summer project as Chase and I so I've known Danielle as long as I've known Chase!
Joel and Amy moved out to Fullerton a year ago so Joel could go to seminary and work at a church. James and Danielle moved to Burbank in May so James could pursue his dream of making movies. David (who lives in DC with his bride Arielle) called Chase a couple months ago and said they were going to visit James and Joel in LA over Labor Day weekend....and the rest is history...Chase was on that like white-on-rice.

It was so neat to see our husbands reunite...they were like little boys again. They ate together, played games together, swam in the ocean together, fought together... We (the wives) looked at each other on many occasions and laughed at our hubbies.

Friday we went to Laguna Beach, Saturday we did Hollywood, Rodeo Rd, Malibu, and Third St. Promenade at Sana Monica. Sunday we went miniature golfing and hung out. What a weekend. Our camera battery died Saturday afternoon so I'll have to wait until Danielle posts her wonderful beach pictures to get the pics I'm missing.

Got to love the LA smog! The city is in the background of this photo...although you can barley see it through the smog.

James ran through the water trying NOT to get wet....so, Chase wanted to see if he could beat him. He did a pretty good job if I say so myself. Below are the results.

Griffith Park

2008-09-02T09:35:00.000-05:00

Our Labor Day weekend began Thursday night as we flew to LA for a little reunion with some friends. James and Danielle picked us up from the airport and immediatly took us to Griffith Park to see LA at night. The picture below was our first impression of LA....lots and lots of lights! The place is HUGE! Jupiter was shinning bright that night so we were able to see its stripes through a telescope the park had set up. Thursday night was just the start of a great weekend to come...

Cookie of the Month

2008-08-28T10:16:00.001-05:00

In the back of every Martha Stewart Living magazine you'll find the cookie of the month. I've always wanted to do this but never had enough motivation...until now. Chase and I do welcome visits to all the new residents and you can't knock on someones door for the first time empty handed...so, we(meaning I) are implementing the cookie of the month! Once a month I'll make a HUGE batch of cookie dough, freeze most of it, and bake up a fresh match once a week before welcome visits. It will also give me a good excuse to drop by the leasing office and serve the staff.

I know you are all wondering what kind is the first cookie of the month?!? My favorite of course! Snickerdoodles!!!! YUM! A good snickerdoodle beats a chocolate chip cookie any day. This is yet another reason for you to come visit! I'll always have homemade cookie dough in the freezer waiting to be baked! ....I can see it now, sitting by the beautiful pool with a plate of cookies straight from the oven... What are you waiting for? Can you tell we really like visitors?

Apartment Pic's

2008-08-26T09:19:00.000-05:00

We have taken a grand total of 3 pictures of our apartment. We are still far from settled and buried in boxes. Chase managed to get one picture of me while I was walking into our apartment for the first time. The other two are the pool and hot tub. I'm posting these pics to entice everyone to come visit us! The pool and hot tub are amazing!

Martin Pics

2008-08-26T09:12:00.000-05:00

Dayle and Martin visited last week. Martin is now 5 months old and just over 20lbs!!! He's the cutest nephew an Aunt could have! I just want to reach through the computer screen and pinch those adorable cheeks :) These pics were taken at our apartment pool. Martin is such a water baby...he loves relaxing and splashing in the water.